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Question 59

As an atheist: Who are you? What do you want? Why are you here? (Damn Vorlons are never around when you need one!)

• Rob Poirier, age 20

  I want to live an enjoyable life

  basically I'm here to survive and procreate, on a more advanced level I'm here to make an important contribution to this society... although I'm not so sure I wanna do that... (-=+tetrahydrocannabinol+=-)

• > As an atheist: Who are you?

  I yam what I yam. Feel free to call me Popeye if you want to. Popeye the atheist, yeah, that's me.

  >What do you want?

  Spinach.

  >Why are you here?

  I'm looking for Spinach. Anyone got any? I have some carrots and broccoli to trade. Any takers? (Elroy Willis)

• I find it hard to know how to answer 'as an atheist'. But I'm me, I want to enjoy life, and I am here because my parents enjoyed themselves. (Jim Sarbeck)

• You are not ready<\Kosh> (Paul Andrew King #354)

• Who are you: I am a human being named Fred.What do you want: I want to live forever (see next answer). Why are you here: To learn everything there is to know about everything.

  p.s. What's a Vorlon? (Fred Stone #1369)

• 1) Who am I?

  I am I. What am I supposed to answer to that sort of a question anyways?

  2) What do I want?

  That when I'm dead people will tell funny anecdotes about my superior intellectual capabilities.

  3) Why am I here?

  If you mean why am I in the physical universe I can only answer: no particular reason. (Aatu Koskensilta #1377)

• > Who are you? I am a collection of self-aware mental states, which are being generated by the brain of an adult human male.

  > What do you want?

  I want to understand how everything works.

  > Why are you here?

  To increase the probability that the genes of my host will propagate.

  > (Damn Vorlons are never around when you need one!)

  Um, wasn't it Lorien who asked these questions? (Carl Funk #1229)

  ************* Yeah, but the Vorlons could have supplied the answers. Not that they would have... ************

• Who am I? Hey, who is asking? Oh OK since it's you Mickey, I am Paul Roberts, occasionally one or more of the following (in no order): middle class Englishman (or pommy bastard whichever is preferred) commercial software designer, drunk, uncle, boyfriend, amateur mythographer, trash movie fan and possessor of an occasionally operational brain - oh ... and atheist from birth. Can't answer the question "as an atheist" I've never thought there was an alternative.

  What to I want? Well I'd sell my soul for a tuna melt :) No wait a minute I already did that back in '76.

  What am I doing here? Do you mean on usenet or on the planet? I write to alt.atheism because I am an atheist and because I see religion being used to twist peoples minds and because it is fun and I learn a lot.

  What am I doing on the planet? Duh.. um ... Well everyone has to be somewhere! (Paul Roberts #49)

  PS now you tell me what a Vorlon is.

• Who are you?

  Organic Machinery...Who the hell are you? ;)

  >What do you want?

  A lifetime of maximum happiness and minimum amounts of suffering.

  >Why are you here?

  "Here" being alt.atheism? Because, I'm an atheist, and this "place" is fun, fun, fun.

  If "here" means "existence," then, there is NO "why." (Organic Machinery #284)

• I am Locutus of Borg. I want to improve quality of life for all species. I am here to assimilate you.

  *thumps side of head*

  Sorry about that. Ahem. I am me. I want a toy rocket ship for winter yule. I'm here to waste my time on the usenet.

  > (Damn Vorlons are never around when you need one!)

  Who needs one of those tin-plated pixies? We have the xians to walk around and blather nonsense at us. (Frank Wustner #119)

• I am the walker, and I am the road. I am the singer, and I am the song. I am the knight, and I am the sword. I am the teller, and I am the tale. I am the dancer, and I am the music.

  Or, in other words:

  Nicolas Patrick Demers, 27, Master's Student in Computing Science, came out as agnostic in the summer of '96, as atheist in the spring of '97, poet, writer, queer, occasional troublemaker and hellraiser, nearsighted, French-Canadian, Caucasian, male, ex-Ontarian, happy Vancouverite.

  > What do you want?

  A boyfriend, a life, fame, money, adoration, world peace. Right now, I'd be happy if I made it through this semester in one piece.

  > Why are you here?

  To learn to teach. To procrastinate.

  > (Damn Vorlons are never around when you need one!)

  Nah, who needs Vorlons when you've got G'Kar? "Truth is a river. God is the mouth of the river" (Nicolas P. Demers #155)

• Who are you?

  A proud atheist.

  >>What do you want?

  locally or globally? Locally I want a CDR, them things are cool. Globally I want all of religion to vanish off this earth and the world to live in peace. I know.. keep dreaming.

  >>Why are you here?

  Here in this NG? or here on this planet?

  I'm in this NG because it's a place I can meet and think with like minds. This planet? I'm here to conquer it of course. I'm the anti-christ!

  >>(Damn Vorlons are never around when you need one!)

  What the hell's a Vorlon??? (Dread #1299)

  Ah, so that's why you gave strictly serious answers to these particular questions. Vorlons are highly evolved aliens from the science fiction tv show "Babylon 5". All three questions were asked by different people in the course of the series.

  Plus, they are just good questions.

  ******************** And, a year and a half later, I have to admit that everyone had so much fun with this question that I couldn't resist showing it. ********************